Excess of everything is bad. I would have used and realized this proverb for countless times in my life. But I have recently realized that deficit of "something" is not good either and especially then when you had that "something" in excess sometime back. The craving for that "something" really hurts when you know you cant get more of it now. But the sooner you realise that this is all you have, the better it is. Then the best you can do is, go back the memory lane, cherish the good old times and sometimes wish that had you understood the importance of your "something" sooner.
Two and half months into his MBA program, I dont get to see Gaurav much often now. To be more precise, yes I see him after a lapse of 15-16 hours everyday but I dont get to talk to him so much now. Other than the five minute dinner break, our home wears a pin drop silence. Just like the one it has now. All I can hear is the clock. Tired of not talking him for days, I asked him to give me 10 minutes everyday. Talk to only me during that time without his laptop or i-Phone around. You wont believe but the bliss I find in those ten minutes is beyond explanation. Now we talk about what we both did during our day and about those minor details that we had never discussed in our last 2 years of married life. Sometimes when we dont have anything to say, I just lay my head in his lap and we just savour each other's existance. And if sometimes, I dont get my 10 minutes, they get stacked up and get a bonus of 5 minutes over 30 minutes.
In his busy schedule, going for shopping is out of question. Now I am so used to going out alone that I dont even expect him to show up even if its about his dress shirts or oxford shoes. On last to last friday, I called him up to check what time would he come back. Macy's had some sale going on and I intended to spend my friday evening getting some good stuff. But instead he asked me to pick him up from college so that we could go out for some shopping. Voila!!!.. I got dressed up quickly with the prettiest smile on my face. The next day when my friend asked me what did I do over the weekend, I proudly said "I went out on a date with my husband".
It was our second Karwachuth together and like any other Indian female I wanted him to come home early. Quiet sure of the answer I would get, I still asked him for this favour. "I am sorry baby, but it would be very difficult. I have this this and this. I cant come before 6". Did I hear a 6?? I couldnt help smiling as I had not expected him come sooner than 8-9. I just wanted him to be back home before moon comes up. Gaurav surprised me by coming home at 5. He made my day.
Now that I understand that we cant spend so much time together like our good old days, I cherish those little time slots even more. When I know we cant go out for a movie, watcing it at home with his arms around my waist is so much more fun. When I know we dont have time to go out for dinner, going out and taking a quick ice-cream bite is so relaxing. Showing up at his college for even 10 minutes seems like a lifetime now. Its unbelivable when my friends cancel their program of coming along so that we can have a time just for ourselves. Yes, I have started taking pleasure in the little joys of life and I am Loving it :)
p.s. but jaya I really wanted you to come along that day
Two and half months into his MBA program, I dont get to see Gaurav much often now. To be more precise, yes I see him after a lapse of 15-16 hours everyday but I dont get to talk to him so much now. Other than the five minute dinner break, our home wears a pin drop silence. Just like the one it has now. All I can hear is the clock. Tired of not talking him for days, I asked him to give me 10 minutes everyday. Talk to only me during that time without his laptop or i-Phone around. You wont believe but the bliss I find in those ten minutes is beyond explanation. Now we talk about what we both did during our day and about those minor details that we had never discussed in our last 2 years of married life. Sometimes when we dont have anything to say, I just lay my head in his lap and we just savour each other's existance. And if sometimes, I dont get my 10 minutes, they get stacked up and get a bonus of 5 minutes over 30 minutes.
In his busy schedule, going for shopping is out of question. Now I am so used to going out alone that I dont even expect him to show up even if its about his dress shirts or oxford shoes. On last to last friday, I called him up to check what time would he come back. Macy's had some sale going on and I intended to spend my friday evening getting some good stuff. But instead he asked me to pick him up from college so that we could go out for some shopping. Voila!!!.. I got dressed up quickly with the prettiest smile on my face. The next day when my friend asked me what did I do over the weekend, I proudly said "I went out on a date with my husband".
It was our second Karwachuth together and like any other Indian female I wanted him to come home early. Quiet sure of the answer I would get, I still asked him for this favour. "I am sorry baby, but it would be very difficult. I have this this and this. I cant come before 6". Did I hear a 6?? I couldnt help smiling as I had not expected him come sooner than 8-9. I just wanted him to be back home before moon comes up. Gaurav surprised me by coming home at 5. He made my day.
Now that I understand that we cant spend so much time together like our good old days, I cherish those little time slots even more. When I know we cant go out for a movie, watcing it at home with his arms around my waist is so much more fun. When I know we dont have time to go out for dinner, going out and taking a quick ice-cream bite is so relaxing. Showing up at his college for even 10 minutes seems like a lifetime now. Its unbelivable when my friends cancel their program of coming along so that we can have a time just for ourselves. Yes, I have started taking pleasure in the little joys of life and I am Loving it :)
p.s. but jaya I really wanted you to come along that day
Bhabhi!
ReplyDeleteBeautiful put in words by you and tell you what this is how you are going to make him succeed!
Priorities shuffle but there is no better strength you get than your family's.
Divya can relate to this word by word :)
With our Jobs, My Study (MBA and what not), Her pregnancy, doctor visits, festivals...etc etc etc ... it is really tough.
But as we get busy we become innovative also to chalk out our time. I have made a full day timetable where in I am giving 1-1.5 hour a day to Divya. She sleeps without my hug these days (and that is an atrocity i know). Still we are happy and cheeful about life like you two.
time flies and things will shuffle again...
God Bless & Take care
Vinay
Vinay
Lovely Blog Naiya.. Seems like the same boat i sail in at times..
ReplyDeletei am sure any married woman (wanted to write 'girl' though ;-) ) can relate to your story at some point or the other. The way you have articulated this phase of your life, its commendable. Shows your perseverance and love for Gaurav.
Your blog made my day (wont hesitate to mention yeah its a good soothing feel!)as if telling me that i am not alone going through all this and that its OK even if its happening. All we need to do is to continue to cherish every single moment we are able to grab together and support each other.
Sacrificing for the most loved one is another satisfactory feeling if you understand what i mean :)
This is life afterall !
I know you wanted me to dear and thanks for that, but then we always hang around together :)
ReplyDeleteI can empathize with you totally, how cherished such moments can be, we do invent new ways and adapt to situations , don't we? I am also thankful that I found such nice friends like u here, otherwise it would have been really tough
Nice Blog naiya.......keep it up.......
ReplyDeleteWell.. What can I say Naiya... In a way it is bad but the good thing is you don't have responsibilities like a baby! Imagine doing everything for the child without your better half (considering you the best half) :-) I long for those 10 mins too but I have to share it Medha at that time also!
ReplyDeleteSo you are lucky!
Like your blogs!
Cheers
Divya (Krishnamurthy!)
Lovely Bolg Naiya.............keep it up!!!
ReplyDelete